


still

by HomesickAlien



Category: Ensemble Stars! (Video Game)
Genre: M/M, hair braiding boyfriends, theyre boyfriends
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-13
Updated: 2018-01-13
Packaged: 2019-03-03 00:25:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,252
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13329603
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HomesickAlien/pseuds/HomesickAlien
Summary: Keep me out of your dreams, I have no place there.





	still

**Author's Note:**

> tfw you're not really in enstars fandom anymore but ibanagi is canon and good

Hours have passed, now, since they met in their personal room together, and not so much as a word has really been spoken. Sitting back to back, encroached in their own personal interests, sometimes it seems lonelier being together than it would be just to be left alone. That’s in no way an insult to their relationship, it’s all in the name of business, after all. Sometimes Ibara feels just as confused as Nagisa always is, forgetting that very standard he’d forced onto their partnership first.

Of course, it’s easy to be lost when Nagisa can’t help but be painful honest, just like a child. Wiser than he seems, more thoughtful and curious but never smart enough to lie about what’s important. Maybe it’s rubbing off on Ibara, all the time they’re stuck with one another, it’s a simple trade of habits. The line between using and accidentally becoming friends, it’s a mystery he’d rather keep veiled, if only for his own image. In the end, it’s easier to be evil than it is to apologize.

“...How is it coming?”

Ibara chooses to keep quiet for a moment, giving the implication of an answers he knows full well will go over Nagisa’s head. It always does, social interactions with a socially inept child never seem to go the way they’re expected to. Sometimes he wishes he could plot those out, too, for his leader; maybe Nagisa would cause less trouble that way. If Ibara could think that far ahead, maybe he’d experiment with it sometime, but for now just plotting out shows is more than enough a hassle.

“It’s coming. And what about you?”

Nagisa lowers his hand hanging over his head for a bit, looking over his shoulder into Ibara’s eyes before commenting.

“It’s going well. Hold out your hand.”

Ibara follows his superior’s orders, although they’re never really spoken in a tone that suits a general. He doesn’t let his eyes wander from the papers he’s been staring at–  _ not that he’s really reading them anymore _ – until he feels the gritty texture of a rock in his palms. Well, he supposes it’s not really as simple as a rock, either, but this interest of his leader has no impact on him, or Adam, or Eden, and it’s irrelevant to focus on for him at all unless prompted to.

Everything in life and its purpose, he has them all well organized in his mind, but taking time off every so often is something he’s only just started learning to do. Not so much of his own free will, but by simple association with this enigmatic partner of his.

“...It’s a tooth.”

So blunt and short-spoken, to Ibara it really doesn’t look much different from the rocks kids kick off sidewalks. He supposes the same could be said for most people, all looking the same with their accomplishments and motivations buried deep within their chests. Somehow, none of that ever seems to get through to Nagisa, or maybe it’s just that Nagisa doesn’t care either way. Accepting everybody, regardless of the ulterior motives, only seeing them for their face value. Ibara doesn’t have to understand him to make use of him, that’s how he might of reasoned it once, but it’s impossible to satiate this curiosity in him. To stand on stage with Nagisa as equals might be an impossibility for two people of such different world views, but sitting this close together feels wholesome and comfortable and grounding in a similar way. 

“...Billions of years, and yet nothing at all changes. We’re still the same sinners we were yesterday.”

“I like to think I’m sinning much more today than I was yesterday.”

Ibara says with a crude smile, waving the paper in his other hand to straighten it out, bring it back to his attention. He takes Nagisa’s hand with his left, returning the fossil, although not easily letting him go, either. Leaning back with a sigh, and letting the papers he’s so diligently been studying fall to his side, Ibara stares up at the ceiling looking to understand the answers Nagisa is certain he already understands. Believing in God as whole heartedly as a child, what would Nagisa do if he were cast into Hell? God might be forgiving of Nagisa in his innocence, but there’s no real hope for someone like him, relishing in his wrong-doings and sacrificing his own soul for the livelihood of all God’s other children. 

Just like the Devil, although he supposes he’s fallen for the wrong person.

Ibara reaches his hand up to the split ends of Nagisa’s hair, swatting away at it like a cat without much thought to it. Just the act of being foolish and simple drains away his worries, it must be how Nagisa feels when Ibara takes control of his life. Simplifies the equation and lets Nagisa live only the best parts of his life, the ones that will drive his success. 

“Did you go and let your hair get tangled again? My, my, Your Excellency, that’s no way for a man of your stature to be presenting himself, now is it?”

Ibara’s tone is condescending, but his decided actions are sincere. Nagisa is terribly awful and taking care of himself, the type of person who might not really be able to dress themself in the morning without help. Naturally, all things Ibara does come with their own benefits, if his choice in distraction is beneficial to his leader, then it doesn’t seem at all like a waste to spend hours just running fingers through Nagisa’s needlessly long hair.

He wonders if Nagisa’s ever even cut his hair, or if it’s just been growing and growing since he were a child. Wild and unkempt as his leader were raised to be, and still it has this oddly mystical aura to it. Like it could go on forever, and ever, swallow him whole and relieve him of his worries. This beautiful shade of grey, resonating with life and death, there’s a word for this feeling that eats away at him everytime he runs a brush through Nagisa’s hair, but he’ll never say it outloud. No, he’ll never even think it, his only weakness that no one shall ever know about.

“...It’s better this way.”

That’s the last comment Nagisa has to make, before returning his gaze to another fossil resting between his fingertips. So many intricate details to unravel in such an old and unnecessary thing, there’s no way to move forward in being held back by the past. Yet Nagisa always seems to pull through that way, hanging on to the tiniest bit of thread that might keep his life simple and painless as it felt like in his childhood days. 

Simple, and simply meaningless. There’s nothing good Ibara could bring to him, and yet Nagisa isn’t concerned in the slightest. 

And neither is Ibara, straightening out strands of Nagisa’s hair and dancing them around one another into delicate braids. It seems with every one he finishes, his stress fades away from memory, like this moment might never end when Nagisa’s so much hair to braid. One by one, and little by little, even if God’s fate for them is eternal damnation, it seems just like this, he could stand to live a thousand nights in Hell for just one more moment like this.

It’s Ibara’s precious secret, after all, that if he’s the perfect partner for Nagisa, then it’s only natural Nagisa is the perfect partner for him.

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry if characterization isn't the best ... only two events to shoot from lol but I've been crying about these two for the last week or so ...  
> Please comment. Please love Ibara he's done nothing wrong.


End file.
